Wednesday, July 2, 2014
Shepastor: "Sewing in Tears, Reaping in Joy..."
Today I sat with a woman who shared her painful testimony of surviving being molested as a child. Her wounds ran deep, very, very deep. She shared that she didn’t realize the depth of her pain until she was a full grown woman. She talked about the years of dysfunction that followed her childhood experiences and the layers of pain, poison and destruction that loomed over her life.
Despite her successes in college and subsequent career, she could not quiet the smoldering rage underneath the mask of being “cool, calm and collected.” Not being a “church girl,” she didn’t now “church etiquette.” She saw the people praising, clapping, singing, dancing...testifying. She didn't understand the dynamics of "church." She knew, however, that she needed to get to Jesus. Hungry for a place of acceptance, a place of healing, a place to share her struggle, she believed church to be that place. Little did she know that frequently, "church people" are wearing masks of their own, caught up in a dance of mediocrity and religiosity. Unaware of the aforementioned dynamics, she fell down before the Lord in the presence of the people and began to cry out to God concerning all of her agony. During testimony service, she began to share the things that happened to her as a young girl, but that the Lord was healing and delivering her.
Unfortunately, the “church” was not equipped to handle her transparency. Instead of crying and praying with her, they shunned her and advised her to “not to say so much next time.” She was crushed. But thanks be to God for the power of His Holy Spirit. This dear sister was able to discern that the frailty of human hearts brought about the rejection and not our loving God.
The Lord has since led her to another ministry and Christian counseling. She has since experienced the Lord giving her “beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning and the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness.” Today she declared, “I know that the enemy tried to destroy me, but God instead took the ugliness of my journey and is now using me to minister to others who’ve experienced the same pain and suffering.”
“Precious seeds” have sprung forth from her tears. While our experiences are all different, we too have tears…we too have precious seed that are born out of our pain, our suffering, yes even our dysfunction. May we too find spaces and places to release that pain honestly and transparently. May we place our seeds in the fertile soil of other broken and wounded hearts and may they too join us on the healing journey with great joy.
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Until next Wednesday,
In Faith, Hope and Perseverance,